Some CPA Humor
I know some farmers probably feel that CPA do not have any humor, but I think we enjoy jokes about our profession a lot. So, in that spirit, I am listing some humor below.
Trick or Treat
The doorbell rings, and a farmer answers it. Here stands this plain, but well dressed kid, saying “Trick or treat?”.
The mans asks what the kid is dressed up as for Halloween.
The kid replies, “I’m an IRS agent.”
Then the kid takes 35% of the farmer’s candy, leaves and doesn’t say thank you.
Ashes to Taxes
A farmer on his deathbed called his frient and said “I want you to promise me that when I die you will have my remains cremated.”
His friend asked, “And what do you want me to do with your ashes?”
The man said “Just put them in an envelope and mail them to the IRS. Write on the envelope ‘Now you have everything.'”
Income Tax Law
All the Congress, all the CPAs, all the tax lawyers, and a convention of wizards can not tell for sure what the income tax law says.
The Oldest Profession
A surgeon, CPA and a lawyer were arguing about which of them was practicing the oldest profession.
The surgeon said “God created Eve from a rib from Adam. Obvisiouly, God is a surgeon, so medicine is the oldest profession.”
The CPA protested, “Before God created Eve from Adam’s rib, he created an orderly universe from chaos. That clearly shows that God was an accountant before he was a surgeon. Accounting then has to be the oldest profession.
The lawyer sat for a moment smiling, looking at the surgeon and the CPA. “That may be true,” the lawyer said shrugging his shoulders, “but who created the chaos?”
Paul Neiffer is a certified public accountant and business advisor specializing in income taxation, accounting services, and succession planning for farmers and agribusiness processors. Paul is a principal with CliftonLarsonAllen in Walla Walla, Washington, as well as a regular speaker at national conferences and contributor at agweb.com. Raised on a farm in central Washington, he has been immersed in the ag industry his entire life, including the last 30 years professionally. Paul and his wife purchase an 180 acre ranch in 2016 and enjoy keeping it full of animals.
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